Being a parent is wonderful, but let’s be honest, parenting is hard work. And although my children are healthy and relatively problem free, I do face challenges with them, that sometimes I feel ill-equipped to address.
One of my children, for instance, is socially awkward. Last year at school he made friends with two girls in his class, and said he played with them at recess. This year, as the classes have been mixed up, and his friends have moved on, he now tells me they don’t play together anymore. He says that he plays by himself, or walks around the playground looking for his siblings. This breaks my heart, because although he’s socially awkward, I know he likes being with others.
So, I have found myself reading articles and books, and even children’s books, on how to form friendships and play nicely with others. It may be that I am being overly paranoid, and perhaps he will figure it out over time. But the truth is that he doesn’t seem wired to pick up on social cues, to feel empathy, and to control his emotions. I never thought I would have to teach this kind of lesson, and I never knew how hard it would be.
So, the other day over lunch, as was asking my kids about their day, fishing as usual for any piece of information they may give, that my son said: “I played with X today. I just asked him if I could join in, and he said yes.”
I almost cried. He seemed so happy. And it has taken us 8 months of talking about joining in recess play before it actually happened.
Who would have thought something so small could mean so much? And be so hard to achieve? If any of you can relate, please let me know.
